Secession: It's the American Way
Apr. 9th, 2003 03:09 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
demiurgentSo... the people of New England and the Northeast -- who (excepting New Hampshire, where I admit I sit) overwhelmingly supported Al Gore, who actually won the election but isn’t President. They’re against the War, too. They’re against the tax cut. And after being the only region of the Country actually attacked in the War on Terror, they find the department earmarked to specifically defend them massively underfunded. In the meantime, civil rights and privacy rights are being drained away willy nilly, regardless of our wishes in the matter.
It seems to me that a couple of hundred years back, we of New England and the Northeast felt that perhaps our overlords didn’t respect our rights, took away our voice and imposed their will on us. And oddly enough, we came up with a solution to that perception. It involved informing said overlords that their services would no longer be required.
It’s time we secede again. It’s time we wish the increasingly Evangelical, increasingly right wing, increasingly xenophobic, increasingly corporate, increasingly classist, increasingly autocratic central government that as much as we’ve appreciated being the founders of their nation, they’ve stopped getting it right and we’ve decided to make a go of it on our own instead. We don’t claim we’ll be a Superpower. We don’t claim we’ll be the greatest nation on the Earth.
But we’ll be free. And we won’t be ashamed.
Maine, New Hampshire (if we must), Vermont, Massachusetts, Connecticut, New York, New Jersey, Rhode Island, Pennsylvania and Delaware. We could be American New England, collectively, or the United American States. Or maybe we could name ourselves after John Adams, who never wavered in his support of freedom.
I’m serious. We could secede. We could let the rest of those poor bastards have George W. Bush, Donald Rumsfeld, Toby Keith, Colin Powell, Rush Limbaugh, Texas, Arkansas, Orange Alerts, The Patriot Act, Patriot Act II, the suspension of Habeas Corpus and Crank Yankers all to themselves. The South, which has mentioned Rising Again, could take the opportunity to do the same and do whatever the Hell they like. If they agree to let us be our own country, we can agree to recognize them as their own. We could do the same with California and the Pacific Northwest, should they decide there’s no way they’d want to be associated with a United States without us. Texas, while fitting in perfectly with this new, smaller, Christian dominated United States, might choose to become a Republic sheerly because they really want to, and that’s fine. We’d recognize them too.
We’d even give anyone who thinks George W. Bush is doing the best possible job in all ways a chance to move away and live in the United States, penalty free if they promise not to come back. And as a sign of good faith, we’d let the elder George Bush keep his summer home in Kennebunkport, Maine. If, of course, he agrees to customs searches on his way through.
Odd things would happen if we seceded. For one thing... terrorists would stop wanting to blow things up in New York City as a symbol, since the Big Apple would be coming with us. We would be able to enact legislation without catering to the Religious Right. Hell, we could set up a Parliamentary System and have the ability to throw our government out whenever they started pissing us off, preventing our reaching the point we’ve gotten to. We’d trade cheerfully with the U.S., with Canada (who might like us a lot better than they currently like the U.S.), we’d keep good relations with Europe, actually have good relations with France, and have a nation that from its first moment was anti-slavery in all incarnations. If Tony Blair, desperate to please whoever the President of the United States, currently is, declares himself an enemy to our new English state, we can even enjoy a Revolutionary War revival of anti-British slogans. More than likely, though, the U.K. would happily embrace us, form various strategic alliances, and sell their excellent beer in our nation. Free speech, dissent and protest would be embraced. Fox News would be foreign press. We would fund a public radio and television at BBC levels and it would develop a standard of news and insight that would be the envy of all developed nations, except the U.S. which would make fun of it. We would keep David Letterman but give up Jay Leno. We would keep Jon Stewart but say goodbye to Craig Kilborn and Jimmy Kimmel. In the interest of good relations with our former compatriots in the U.S. we would retain Regis Philbin.
Most of all... I wouldn’t be ashamed of what my leaders have done in my name, and I wouldn’t feel so powerless to do anything about it.
So let’s do it. Let’s form committees. Let’s have debates. Let’s write a new Constitution. There’s no reason we can’t. If enough states choose to come along, there wouldn’t even have to be unpleasantness with the U.S.
Let’s secede. John Adams would want us to.
It seems to me that a couple of hundred years back, we of New England and the Northeast felt that perhaps our overlords didn’t respect our rights, took away our voice and imposed their will on us. And oddly enough, we came up with a solution to that perception. It involved informing said overlords that their services would no longer be required.
It’s time we secede again. It’s time we wish the increasingly Evangelical, increasingly right wing, increasingly xenophobic, increasingly corporate, increasingly classist, increasingly autocratic central government that as much as we’ve appreciated being the founders of their nation, they’ve stopped getting it right and we’ve decided to make a go of it on our own instead. We don’t claim we’ll be a Superpower. We don’t claim we’ll be the greatest nation on the Earth.
But we’ll be free. And we won’t be ashamed.
Maine, New Hampshire (if we must), Vermont, Massachusetts, Connecticut, New York, New Jersey, Rhode Island, Pennsylvania and Delaware. We could be American New England, collectively, or the United American States. Or maybe we could name ourselves after John Adams, who never wavered in his support of freedom.
I’m serious. We could secede. We could let the rest of those poor bastards have George W. Bush, Donald Rumsfeld, Toby Keith, Colin Powell, Rush Limbaugh, Texas, Arkansas, Orange Alerts, The Patriot Act, Patriot Act II, the suspension of Habeas Corpus and Crank Yankers all to themselves. The South, which has mentioned Rising Again, could take the opportunity to do the same and do whatever the Hell they like. If they agree to let us be our own country, we can agree to recognize them as their own. We could do the same with California and the Pacific Northwest, should they decide there’s no way they’d want to be associated with a United States without us. Texas, while fitting in perfectly with this new, smaller, Christian dominated United States, might choose to become a Republic sheerly because they really want to, and that’s fine. We’d recognize them too.
We’d even give anyone who thinks George W. Bush is doing the best possible job in all ways a chance to move away and live in the United States, penalty free if they promise not to come back. And as a sign of good faith, we’d let the elder George Bush keep his summer home in Kennebunkport, Maine. If, of course, he agrees to customs searches on his way through.
Odd things would happen if we seceded. For one thing... terrorists would stop wanting to blow things up in New York City as a symbol, since the Big Apple would be coming with us. We would be able to enact legislation without catering to the Religious Right. Hell, we could set up a Parliamentary System and have the ability to throw our government out whenever they started pissing us off, preventing our reaching the point we’ve gotten to. We’d trade cheerfully with the U.S., with Canada (who might like us a lot better than they currently like the U.S.), we’d keep good relations with Europe, actually have good relations with France, and have a nation that from its first moment was anti-slavery in all incarnations. If Tony Blair, desperate to please whoever the President of the United States, currently is, declares himself an enemy to our new English state, we can even enjoy a Revolutionary War revival of anti-British slogans. More than likely, though, the U.K. would happily embrace us, form various strategic alliances, and sell their excellent beer in our nation. Free speech, dissent and protest would be embraced. Fox News would be foreign press. We would fund a public radio and television at BBC levels and it would develop a standard of news and insight that would be the envy of all developed nations, except the U.S. which would make fun of it. We would keep David Letterman but give up Jay Leno. We would keep Jon Stewart but say goodbye to Craig Kilborn and Jimmy Kimmel. In the interest of good relations with our former compatriots in the U.S. we would retain Regis Philbin.
Most of all... I wouldn’t be ashamed of what my leaders have done in my name, and I wouldn’t feel so powerless to do anything about it.
So let’s do it. Let’s form committees. Let’s have debates. Let’s write a new Constitution. There’s no reason we can’t. If enough states choose to come along, there wouldn’t even have to be unpleasantness with the U.S.
Let’s secede. John Adams would want us to.
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(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 06:43 am (UTC)What, I don't get to play? :P
(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 07:03 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 07:04 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 09:17 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 09:46 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 09:44 am (UTC)It's already got the worst pollution in the country, a education system that has to guarantee a chair in the state colleges to every high school grad because their knowldege base is so abyssmal they can't get in anywhere else, and they just love that old "hate the sin, FRY the sinner" right-wing psycho-christian state religon crap.
Let's give them Texas, and keep the rest for ourselves.
They've got ocean access, a varied climate so they can grow food if they want, and a built in trading partner in Mexico, so we don't have to deal them. They've got oil, so they can buy whatever they want, right? (At least for the next 40 years or so until the wells run dry.) If we could convince every right wing-bible thumping gun toting reactionary free speech is bad if you disagree with me Dubya has Jesus' unlisted phone number Ronald Reagan invented fire and Bill Clinton is the devil inbred redneck moron that we were rewarding them with a trip to Six Flags for such wonderful "God Bless America, or shut up" behavior, I bet we could get them all down there in one weekend. Then we put up a twenty foot tall cyclone fence and start checking papers.
Who's with me?
Andy
(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 10:07 am (UTC)As for why we couldn't keep the rest... frankly, I don't think the core values of the Northeast represent the same core values of the Midwest, or the Southeast, or the Southwest. I think these different regions of what is, after all, a large chunk of the continent have developed different cultures, values and beliefs, and it's time we explored letting them go off and have them. If the Heartland wants (for example) to embrace Christianity as a guiding value for their decisionmaking, they should have that right even if we don't choose to agree or do the same.
I'm actually kind of serious here -- it may be time to consider actual balkanization, to allow all the regions of the current U.S.A. to define themselves the way they think best. That of those regions I would be happiest in the Northeast doesn't change the fact that a lot of people would be happiest in the Midwest, following their values and methods.
But, as Sarah said, Bush would immediately start bombing us. So if we did this, we'd have to expect having to fight over it, and possibly losing. But hey, at least we would have fought the denigration into a police state, then.
(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 09:49 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 10:19 am (UTC)There is also the possibility of another secession. Ohio could group together with like minded states in its area as well. This would split the Midwest, mind, but Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Michigan and Wisconsin could band into its own nation and have both an excellent agricultural base and a robust industrial economy.
(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 10:01 am (UTC)Otherwise, sure, what the hell. Western WA, western OR, and northern CA would be quite happy together, I think. Eastern WA and eastern OR can stick with Idaho. Southern CA...well, who cares, really?
(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 10:24 am (UTC)Beer, of course
Date: 2003-04-10 05:51 am (UTC)John
(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-09 12:53 pm (UTC)Besides, just image the brain drain on the other side. All us "New England intellectuals" should be able to concoct an effective defensive strategy. I think you misunderstood my plan. I'm not talking about keeping the "all the red states for Bush" people that made the map so misleading crimson on election eve 2000...I want their land. Mass relocations. The Republic of Texas for those what think that way, and don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out. You'll be happier there anyways, trust us. No, no, don't start thinking *NOW*...you'll just hurt yourself. I just want to keep as much of the fruited plains and purple mountains majesty as possible. They don't deserve it, and I'm not willing to part with it.
Texas...on the other hand... think of it as kind of like a medieval amputation. All the bad humors concentrated into one area, which you can lop off and cauterize.
Maybe we give Oklahoma, Florida and the Dakotas back to the tribes. They'll be pretty empty already if we adopt this plan.
Andy
(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-10 03:33 am (UTC)Not to nitpick... Well, OK, I'm picking nits, but speaking as a Massachusetts native and a *huge* fan of the vastly underrated second US President, this statement is not strictly true. The Alien and Sedition Acts were enacted during his presidency. Biggest mistake the man ever made, and eventually repealed as such, but he seemed to think it was a pretty good idea at the time.
I'm going to lobby for our new nation to be named for Ben Franklin instead. Just think of all the wonderful quotes we'd have to choose from for our new motto!
(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-10 03:35 am (UTC)That was me up there.
~Robin~
(no subject)
Date: 2003-04-10 11:56 am (UTC)John Adams & Secession
Date: 2004-01-06 11:25 pm (UTC)I know his son supported the right of secession, but I dont believe the senior Adams was a proponent of such. I may be wrong. Please clarify.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-11-03 07:45 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-01 04:08 am (UTC)No other region of the country is better equipped, or has better reason, to secede than the Northeast. With a population of roughly 60 million and a GDP of just under $3 trillion (which would rank third behind the U.S. and Japan), we would be a major player on the world stage. Most importantly, the Northeast (Maine to Delaware) receives only 89 cents in federal spending for each $1.00 it produces in federal taxes; showing it would not only survive but thrive on its own. By the way, the South, receives $1.27 for each $1.00 it sends. Kind of puts all their "get government off our back" bravado in perspective, doesn't it.
Given the country's increasingly deep geographical and ideological divisions, the time may be ripe for seriously forwarding such a movement. Anyone interested in moving beyond discussion groups? My email is jma1972@comcast.net